Why You’re Not Lost: Remembering Who You Are Is the First Step to Finding Your Purpose

A soulful reframe for the woman who feels stuck, behind, or unsure of her next step

There was a long period in my life when I felt like I didn’t belong, like I’d lost my way, searching for purpose, but never quite finding it.

I constantly felt like the misfit, the outsider.
Always on the edges, even when I was surrounded by people.

And that feeling kept asking me:
If I don’t belong here, then why am I here?
Why didn’t I feel at home in the success everyone else chased?
Why did it all feel so empty?

Maybe I was broken. Faulty.
Maybe I was just from a different planet.

Whatever the reason, if I didn’t fit in, then what could I offer that did?

The Life That Looked Right - But Didn’t Feel Like Me

So I forced myself to fit in.
I built a successful corporate career.
I had skills, solutions, and a reputation as a technical expert.

But many days felt like drudgery,
doing something I was good at, but which left my soul hollow.

Resentment crept in.
I’d remind myself it was my choice.
A self-imposed prison.

Maybe if I worked hard enough, one day it would feel right.

The Dress That Didn’t Fit - A Mirror for My Life

It reminds me of a dress I once bought online.

I loved it when I ordered it, the picture was perfect.
But when it arrived, it was beautiful only on the hanger.

When I tried it on, the cut was all wrong for my body.
I wanted so badly for that dress to fit.

Instead of returning it, I stuffed it in the cupboard,
Hoping my body would one day change enough to wear it.

I’d pull it out now and then, try it on, and feel the sting of rejection.
Resenting the shape of my body each time.

One night, as I got ready to go out, I put the dress on again and looked in the mirror.
I already knew it wouldn’t fit, but I tried anyway.

And then I realised no matter how much weight I lost,
I would never be six feet tall or have curves in all the right places.

It just wasn’t me.

Neither was the life I was forcing myself into.

That success I chased, that life I built, it looked like what I should want.
But it wasn’t me.

I was trying to fit in outside of myself.
Outside of who I truly am.

What Remembering Really Means

Those moments of feeling broken weren’t loud.
They didn’t come with meltdowns or dramatic spirals.

They were quiet.
Hidden in the spaces no one else could see.
In the moments when I’d lie awake and think "I should have figured this out by now".

But just like that dress, what I eventually realised was

I wasn’t lost.
I was remembering.

Slowly. Sometimes painfully. Always imperfectly.

That ache I’d been trying to silence or solve wasn’t a flaw.

It was the signal.

The quiet inner knock that said "It’s time to come home now. To yourself".

Not the version of you you’ve tried to become.
Not the one who performs belonging.

The real you, underneath it all.

You’re Not Lost - You’re Coming Home

The truth was, I hadn’t failed at becoming who I should be.
I’d simply forgotten who I already was.

And that forgetting, it wasn’t permanent.
It was more like a song I’d known long ago.
One I couldn’t quite remember the words to,
but the melody lived somewhere deep in my bones.

That’s what purpose began to feel like to me.

Not something I had to chase, or prove, or figure out.
But something I had to remember.

Something already mine.
Already true.

And I realised that my purpose wasn’t out there.
It was in here.

In my essence. In my energy. In my way of seeing the world.

Not a role to play, or a job title to earn.
But a way of being that was uniquely, undeniably mine.

How to Find Your Purpose: Start by Being You

Your purpose lives in your truth.
Your rhythm. Your voice.

It’s the song you’re here to sing
Not someone else’s chorus, but your own melody.
Even if it’s quiet. Even if you’re still learning the words.

And maybe, just maybe...
The very reason you never felt like you belonged
Was because you were never meant to blend in.

You were meant to resonate.

“Your purpose doesn’t start with striving. It starts with remembering - and choosing, again and again, to be who you truly are.”

When You Feel Aligned, Your Melody Sings

When I finally let go of that black dress...
The one that never fit, the one that made me wish I was someone else.
I found another.

A soft blue dress in my favourite shade.
The kind of blue that made my eyes stand out, that lit up my skin,
That felt like me.

And when I wore it, I felt amazing.

People noticed.
They complimented the colour.
They told me I looked radiant, that something about me was glowing.

But it wasn’t just the dress.
It was the way I felt in it.

It fit my shape. It matched my tone.
It didn’t ask me to be anything other than myself.

And that’s what it’s like when you remember who you are.
When you stop trying to fit into someone else’s version of success, beauty, belonging, purpose.
When you find what’s true for you - and choose it.

You feel confident.
You give off good energy.
You move differently in the world.
Your melody begins to sing.

Not because you finally became someone else.
But because you finally came home to yourself.

Your Purpose Begins with Remembering Who You Are

Because purpose doesn’t start with striving.
It starts with remembering.
And choosing, again and again, to be who you truly are.

✨ Ready to Go Deeper?

If you’re ready to stop trying to fit in and start living in alignment with your true self,
The Purpose Blueprint is where we begin.

It’s a guided journey back to you.
To your clarity, your confidence, and your unique way of being in the world.

Because the life that fits?
It’s the one that’s made uniquely for you.

👉 Book your free Purpose Mapping Session today